There is a big
difference to my way of thinking between impulsivity and the phrase “carpe
diem” credited to Horace in 23 BC. This
phrase, “carpe diem”, translates into “seize the day”. In the film, Dead Poet’s Society, the
professor John Keating encourages, “Seize the day, boys. Make your life extraordinary.” The notion of impulsivity on the other hand
speaks to acting out of whim—with little or no forethought. While “seize the day” is proactive,
impulsivity is reactive and learning to live in a proactive state helps all of
use accomplish our goals.
We often tell people
when they are angry to “Stop. Count to
10”. This is good advice in helping us
to learn to manage our impulsivity. If
we would just “stop” and consider we would be in better shape. When we “act in haste” we often are required
to “repent in leisure”. For example,
have you noticed how when you start to look for a new car it is easy to pick
the car that attracts you only to find out after we’ve signed on the dotted
line that we didn’t get the best deal or, even more distressing, picked the
wrong car altogether. It is so easy to feel
that sense of urgency to act that we do not manage our impulsivity and regret
the action almost immediately.
When you think about
the decision we make, we tend to make those decisions based on emotions (which
can certainly lead us to being impulsive) and then begin to rationalize that
decision based on logic. When we do this
we are not managing impulsivity we are simply justifying it. Learning to step back and consider will allow
us and youth to be happier with our decisions.
Building
relationships with others is one place we need to apply managing our
impulsivity. Getting to know a person
well takes time. Learn strategies for
building strong relationships through Consult 4 Kids Virtual Education. Check us out by logging into www.consultfourkids.com and beginning your journey by clicking on the
icon on the top right-hand corner of the website.
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